Today might have gone differently.

Greet a few friends with a hug as we arrive. Meander to the bar for a drink while we wait to get seated. Order a round of oysters. Get to our table, refresh our drinks, order more of our favorites from the oysters we had at the bar. Maybe a couple of recommended starters. We’ll figure out the rest later. On drink three we decide it’s worth ordering at least one or two entrées for the table to share. Another round of drinks. Struggle to share a dessert. A digestif to end the evening. No fuss about it being my birthday, but still a time with a few friends and great food.

This year I sat at home. We ordered in pizza. The world watched America demonstrate it is a white supremacist state. The police murder instead of protect. They conspire to remain blameless for all their actions, no matter what our own eyes can see. The white supremacist leadership of this country calls for violence against people of color protesting state-enabled murder. The white supremacist leadership claim to support non-violent protest, even after they made a spectacle of rejected non-violent protest. The liars lied about whether they lied about directly undermining US foreign policy.

We are sheltering in place. We are shattering in place.